I just read your piece on the woman in the post office and the piece here on the blog and I wanted to add my thoughts: sometimes that person with their eyes downturned coud be having an experience in their life where they need to create distance from others…perhaps a serious migraine, or someone at home/in hospital seriously ill, a partner/lover who announced they are leaving, the doctor with bad news about their health, their beloved cat just got run over…life is not always straight forward…
Last year was one of my hardest years in a full and adventurous life, I am in my middle life era, so plenty of experience of good and not so good times…during the hardest times last year there were days where I did not always lift my face to look out onto the worold for good reason and there it was that I found some of the most generous and sincere communicators – for example, the woman selling fresh fish in the supermarket…coming around from behind the counter in her white rubber apron, plastic gloves, white rubber boots and smelling of fish – as I struggled with my painful and challenging life experiences and a new language and culture, she called me by a sweet, friendly word for a young woman, touching my arm for a moment, patient, slow, generous in her warmth and as I did look up then and meet her eyes, smiling…and taking time…to be just right there…
Time and again, ordinary service people – probably having left school about 15 or 16 – no special training, coaching, during that most difficult year, touched me with their generosity and heartfulness, engaging me and helping me back into the bigger world where total strangers showed caring support, compassion and patience without judgement ordemand – a truly magnificent experience to receive…
Receiving this reminded me of the power of generosity and gratitude for simple living and connection – giving as well as receiving
I invite us all to notice others without judgement/interpretation about what may or may not be going on in their lives that we can then extend our own heartfulness and touch the hearts and souls of those around us – in so doing we may also create the opening to find out more about what really is going on for that person, the one with the down turned eyes and build a bridge of understanding and connection between us.
Hello Vianne:
Thank you for taking the time to offer your candid and thoughtful response to the “woman in the P.O. story”. I hear you 100% as I too have experienced times when I felt disconnected from the world around me due to the circumstances in my life when I welcomed the generosity of spirit of others who extended a hand or offered their energy when I did not have access to my own. Thank you for articulating this so compassionately.
What I ommitted from the story in the interest of space, was that in my continued observation, after customers had left, this individual turned to her co-worker and participated in rather animated discussion. So no judgement from me intended about where she might have been – and it did seem that there was more for her, if she chose.
1.
Carolyn Ingles | October 22, 2009 at 9:32 pm
Love this piece.
There wasn’t enough room for me to comment!!!
Just kidding, I really appreciated the thought process that I started when musing about responses…..thanks for the opportunity.
I’ll try to respond when I have 30 seconds.
2.
Vianne | May 5, 2010 at 10:01 am
I just read your piece on the woman in the post office and the piece here on the blog and I wanted to add my thoughts: sometimes that person with their eyes downturned coud be having an experience in their life where they need to create distance from others…perhaps a serious migraine, or someone at home/in hospital seriously ill, a partner/lover who announced they are leaving, the doctor with bad news about their health, their beloved cat just got run over…life is not always straight forward…
Last year was one of my hardest years in a full and adventurous life, I am in my middle life era, so plenty of experience of good and not so good times…during the hardest times last year there were days where I did not always lift my face to look out onto the worold for good reason and there it was that I found some of the most generous and sincere communicators – for example, the woman selling fresh fish in the supermarket…coming around from behind the counter in her white rubber apron, plastic gloves, white rubber boots and smelling of fish – as I struggled with my painful and challenging life experiences and a new language and culture, she called me by a sweet, friendly word for a young woman, touching my arm for a moment, patient, slow, generous in her warmth and as I did look up then and meet her eyes, smiling…and taking time…to be just right there…
Time and again, ordinary service people – probably having left school about 15 or 16 – no special training, coaching, during that most difficult year, touched me with their generosity and heartfulness, engaging me and helping me back into the bigger world where total strangers showed caring support, compassion and patience without judgement ordemand – a truly magnificent experience to receive…
Receiving this reminded me of the power of generosity and gratitude for simple living and connection – giving as well as receiving
I invite us all to notice others without judgement/interpretation about what may or may not be going on in their lives that we can then extend our own heartfulness and touch the hearts and souls of those around us – in so doing we may also create the opening to find out more about what really is going on for that person, the one with the down turned eyes and build a bridge of understanding and connection between us.
3.
Yolo...You Only Live Once Coach | May 5, 2010 at 3:04 pm
Hello Vianne:
Thank you for taking the time to offer your candid and thoughtful response to the “woman in the P.O. story”. I hear you 100% as I too have experienced times when I felt disconnected from the world around me due to the circumstances in my life when I welcomed the generosity of spirit of others who extended a hand or offered their energy when I did not have access to my own. Thank you for articulating this so compassionately.
What I ommitted from the story in the interest of space, was that in my continued observation, after customers had left, this individual turned to her co-worker and participated in rather animated discussion. So no judgement from me intended about where she might have been – and it did seem that there was more for her, if she chose.
To continued conversation,
Bette